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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Is Divorce "For The Children's Sake" A Good Idea?

Divorce is so so common these days. It's like a game. The first reason is what entertainment companies are putting out these days tells men these days it's OK to degrade women. This can be seen from Tony Soprano strangling his mistress after she threatens to tell his wife about their affair to just about any rap video these days. The message is simple: "just go ahead and live for today and instant gratification.
"Parents will always be parents, divorced or not. You might dislike, despise or even hate your spouse but your children don’t. Divorce and the subsequent absence of a parent is an "enormous loss for them perhaps the very worst effect of divorce". If you’re undecided about divorce, worrying about the possible effects of divorce on your children, the question arises, "will we still argue"? Would you describe the relationship between you and your spouse as a low-conflict marriage or a high-conflict marriage? If high conflict suits you best if your children are constantly exposed to extremely negative and/or abusive words, emotions and behaviours chances are, they are traumatized by it. Divorce really will have a positive effect on your children’s lives. It certainly couldn’t be any worse. If your marriage is in the low level, conflict by squabbles, impatience with each other’s habits, lack of communication and so on, your children may be unhappy but not troubled to any serious degree. Which would your children choose? Life as it is, or a life that’s changed forever a life without one of you at home? The bottom line is, if you are in a low conflict marriage and your paramount concern is your children, divorce will most likely do them more harm than good. Some options are, to try to save your marriage or to do what your children do, accept things as they are. The good news is that low conflict marriages stand the best chance of being saved. With so much hate floating around, take the time to love those who are close to you. It will help you get through what otherwise may be long days and lonely nights.

Remember, Life is too hard to do alone...


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